When you first open your copy Zoids Assault for the Xbox 360, you may at first think that the combination of mechs and the role-playing genre is a perfect fit. These thoughts may linger around while you watch the game boot up on your television as you sit back and prepare yourself for the game. But once the game gets underway, you’ll soon find yourself kicking and screaming wondering why you ever opened the game since Zoids Assault isn’t worth anybody’s time.

If you’ve never heard of Zoids before, here’s a very quick (and I mean quick) history lesson. Zoids is a brand of toy robots made by the Japanese toymaker Tomy that has licensed out the franchise for manga and anime. Now, a few steps beyond television and books, Atlus USA have released Zoids Assault for the Xbox 360.

Moving on, Zoids Assault does a horrible job at presenting a coherent storyline to follow throughout the game. The presentation of the storyline comes in a few forms: the first includes images that have shoddy voice-overs to explain what’s going on, the second is text found on the front of a newspaper that shows up from time to time. You see, with a game that has a manga, anime and toys already on the market, it’s expected that there would be decent storytelling – unfortunately, Zoids Assault couldn’t even masquerade around as a coloring book even if it wanted too in terms of exposition; the storytelling is a complete and absolute waste.

As for the gameplay, Zoids Assault performs somewhat better than it does with its plot devices. Taking control of five various Zoids throughout the campaign, players will move their units along the battle grid one move at a time to gun down their enemies. As a strategy RPG, one would expect a lengthy campaign, but players should expect to finish the 14 missions under the 12 hour mark. Many of the missions will have a few objectives to accomplish, but they aren’t anything new to the genre as you’ll be tasked to take out specific enemies or all enemies, destroy a certain object or survive for a certain amount of turns. Zoids Assault is basically what you should come to anticipate in the strategy RPG genre, but with less appeal and content.

Zoids Assault does permit players to equip their Zoids with new weapons. Each weapon will come with its own attributes that’ll affect your Zoids on the battlefield in terms of how far they can move, how much damage they can afflict, defense, and much more. The real problem with Zoids Assault’s customization options is that you only have five mechs to outfit which limits the entertainment value of making a diverse set of Zoids to command.

The graphical output is far better than the gameplay and the storyline. If you are a fan of the Zoid toys, you’ll feel right at home with a unique recreation of the toys within the game. The models are well detailed and are times charming if you are fan of mechs. Watching your mechs go into battle tends to come off as a thrilling experience since the animations look good and the camera angles presented are impressive. The only downside of the graphics is that there’s a grain filter that takes away from seeing the detailed Zoids.

On the other hand, the sound isn’t as particularly interesting as the graphics. They serve their purpose, but it doesn’t stand out – it’s merely generic. Sure, you might like the simple soundtrack or the undemanding sound effects, but you won’t look back and think about them after the game is completed.

After it’s all said and done, are there any redeeming values to hold on to for Zoids Assault? I’d have to say there are a few attributes that will appeal to hardcore role-playing fans such as earning points for special abilities or customizing your Zoids. But outside of Zoids fans and RPG diehards, there aren’t enough incentives to pay the hefty price that’s attached to Zoids Assault.

Gameplay: 5.2
The storyline doesn’t help keep you interested in the gameplay. The same could be said for the gameplay not creating enough motivation to become involved in the story.

Graphics: 6.1
If you were to overlook the grain filter, Zoids Assault is a nice looking SRPG.

Sound: 5.1
While it isn’t exactly horrible, the audio department doesn’t exactly stand out.

Difficulty: Easy/Medium
If you have a hard time playing SRPGs, it’s recommended you avoid Zoids Assault.

Concept: 4.9
There’s no pulse or heartbeat here to show that Zoids Assault is an exciting game. You’ll become progressively bored with the title within a few hours.

Overall: 5.2
Zoids Assault is a title that won’t win over too many new fans. It has low production values, the storyline is weak, the gameplay is standard and the audio isn’t anything special; all the makings of a below-average video game.